Let’s End this Season of Defeat

Abba, You are almighty, unchanging, holy, and perfect. You love me completely–not just the “good” parts, but all of me–my doubts, insecurities, addictions, depression, distraction, all of it. You are brilliance and strength, eternal youth and ancient wisdom. You are capable of absolutely anything at any time. Nothing is too big or too complicated for You. And You are all good, all pure, all love.

I confess that I feel completely useless, worn out, depressed, and hopelessly distracted. Last night I obviously trusted more in my addictions’ power to comfort and numb me than in Your power to redeem the time and make my evening something magical. I confess that I’m caught in a web and don’t know how to get out. A lot of the time I don’t even want to get out.

Thank You that You keep pulling me back to you, even in the midst of my mess. Thank You that You never give up hope. Thank You that I am on an endless journey through eternity and there is plenty of time.

Please cure me of my hurry-sickness. Please direct me toward the highest and best use of my time, and don’t let me get distracted by that which is unessential to Your purpose. Please bring healing and tenderness and connection to my marriage. Cleanse us from our worldliness and complacency, and set us on fire for You. Redeem this season and make it our best Christmas yet. Thank You for our freedom and power. Please help us to use it wisely. Draw us close to You every minute of the day. Don’t let me wander like a sheep. I’m desperate for You, Abba, yet still running to my unfaithful lovers. Rescue me from myself!!! I beg You. Don’t let me waste even one more day.

Thank You for Your grace, and that defeat is never permanent.

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

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Work, Worship, Wisdom, Parties, and Presence

Abba, You are holy, whole, complete, not lacking anything. You are eternal, infinite, unlimited, without end, forever. You are loving, kind, generous, tenderhearted, forgiving, understanding, compassionate, faithful, true, worthy, dependable. You are the breath we breathe, the beating of our hearts, our souls’ one true desire, the Spirit that animates everything. You are divine, other, almighty, omnipotent, omniscient, beyond all human comprehension. You are beauty, love, comedy, adventure, inspiration, friendship, fun, brilliance, wisdom, courage, hope, faith. You are everything and the only thing worth anything. You are all that matters.

I confess that I wandered into the grasp of the 10,000 things again. Your little sheep has once again gone astray. I confess that i was attempting to run my own life without turning to You every hour for fresh inspiration, fresh filling with Your Holy Spirit, fresh connection and direction. Fresh insight and wisdom.

Thank You for pulling me back to You now. Thank You for your compassion and tenderness and love. Thank You for my incredible family and for the Christmas season. Thank You for saving me out of the grips of religiosity. Thank You for our church and for its freedom. Thank You that the kids get to perform in the Christmas play. Thank You for laughter and hugs and snuggling and “Unconditional Parenting.” Thank You that I get to babysit today, to serve my friends and be trusted with their child. Thank You that You are handling our finances and I don’t need to worry or plot or strive. Thank You for the birthing documentary and that it’s happening so organically and naturally. Thank You for the free coaching session with Jill last week and for the likelihood of opening up a channel of income by offering coaching services. Thank You that Ian is soaking in Your Word and pursuing Your Truth and sharing Your gospel. Thank You for the book Prayer Power and Purpose.

Please guide my daily work in Your perfect way and keep me from taking off on any distracted tangents. Please direct me to worship music that will allow my soul to find its home in You by being redirected to You with each thought, every time the song repeats in my mind. Please give us wisdom as to which channels of income to open up in order to provide for the needs of our family without getting too caught up in the world’s schtuff. Please shape the Tribe of Girlfriends Inner Circle pre-2015 party in the way that best pleases You. Please do the same with our first Prayer and Potluck party, so that we can share our home and family and hearts with our friends. Please help us to get the house & garage “dialed in” so that it’s a great space for that party to happen. Please keep calling me today, loud and clear, to be Your ambassador, Your avatar, Your presence here in my life circumstances.

I love you. I want to Know You. Experience You. Serve You. Glorify You. Magnify You. Love You more. Please You.

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

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My True Calling = Prayer + Worship Warrior

Abba,

You are beyond all comprehension. You are always busy behind the scenes orchestrating beauty and making dreams come true. You love to give us great gifts and to fulfill our hearts’ desires. You are whole and complete, not lacking anything, and steadily working to make us like You in that respect. You are brighter than the sun, stronger than a hurricane, and madly in love with each of us. You are eternal. Forever. Infinite. Divine.

I confess that yesterday I still didn’t take the time out of my oh-so-importantly busy day to pray and to deal with the spiritual realities going on around me as often as I wish I had. I acted and thought on a physical and mental level, letting my flesh and my mind run the show, neglecting the Truth by focusing on the facts and human explanations. I confess that I wasted much of my life till now by worrying about careers, projects, and income, and not living up to my true calling as a prayer warrior and worshiper.

Thank You that You don’t get tired of hearing this and roll your eyes the way I want to right now. Thank You that You gently and persistently pursue me and call me back to my True Path. Thank You for Heaven and that I was raised with complete faith that it’s a real place that I will see one day. Thank You for the questioning and doubting I went through in my 20’s that enabled me to break out of the religiosity and be an open-minded believer. Thank You for the incredible women I get to meet with today and for the dramatic transformation You worked in me in order to take me from being afraid to even attend networking events to being the one who naturally creates them and invites others. Thank You so much for all You’ve done in me. Thank You for Ashleigh Hitchcock reminding me to be my own best friend, and Angela having such an obvious spiritual attack in public that it pulled me out of my complacency and fog of spiritual forgetfulness and into action and prayer. Thank You for teaching me (just now!) that WORSHIP is prayer. Thank You for the enormous wealth of worship songs in my memory bank.

Abba, I ask that You would please keep me in a worshipful state today. Bring songs to my mind and do whatever it takes to keep me worshiping You in gratitude. If it would please You, please bring me a voice coach or whatever transformation You would prefer, to make my voice beautiful, so that I can lead others in worship without self-consciousness. Please do whatever You need to do in me in order to make me fully available for You to shine through and speak through today. Please hold Angela close today, and open her mouth to sing your praises all day long. May she be completely released and freed from the grip of those demons and surrounded by an entire battalion of angels, and may she recognize her high calling and live it out. Bless the Manna Room and make it a place of prayer, praise, power, and Presence even more than a place for great free food and interesting characters. May our Praying Wives Circle be as truly powerful as I imagine it can be, and may it only be the beginning of something epically beautiful that spreads as fast as wildfire. Please give me wisdom in all my actions and interactions today. Take all of my flesh and all my old habits and ideas, and fill me instead with Your Holy Spirit. I want to be all Yours.

Thank You thank You thank You for all You’ve done!!! My life is a miracle.

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen and hallelujah! :)

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