Abba, Light, Love, Creator of All Things,
You are the One Who keeps my heart beating. You give me hope to carry on when all seems lost. You love me even when I’m an absolute mess. You invented the idea of beauty, laughter, romance, and adventure. You’re bigger than the universe and present within every cell of my body. You fill every space with Your incredible energy and love and fire.
I confess that I live most of the day with complete ignorance. Unaware of Your presence. Unfocused. Distracted by 10,000 things. Self-obsessed. Worried about my own little needs and comforts and slights and wants. I confess that I don’t live like a citizen of Heaven at all. I confess that I pass judgment on and find fault with Your sweet children. That I even hate and despise some of them sometimes. I confess that I can be extremely negative and mean.
THANK YOU that You break through all of that. Thank You that You answer prayer in Your time. Thank you that I woke up this morning totally getting what it is that I want to launch–even though it seems like such a selfish venture, I know that You are involved. I knew in that early morning pure energy when I sat up and looked at the clock at 5:02 and suddenly got it–and it felt so much more like a remembering. Like all this time I’d been waiting for an answer that I already knew! I mean, it’s right there in my list of “why’s” and I somehow didn’t see it. Thank You for reminding me that what I’m launching isn’t a coaching service people will pay me for so much as a VIDEO HOSTING CAREER. That’s what I’ve been wanting to do since I was 5! Thank You for allowing me to do that. Thank you for my amazing family and my magical children. Thank You for Ian and our friendship and marriage. Thank You for his support and his practical side, which often comes across as a Threshold Guardian–as in, “Are you sure you want this, Amanda?” 🙂
Please PLEASE guide and shape this venture. Keep me on a short leash, Abba, so I don’t run off on any tangents or get sucked into any distracted, self-obsessed eddies and miss the flow of Life. THANK YOU!!! Please keep me on my knees in gratitude. Please bring me the support tribe I need and with whom I can reciprocate and support in their projects. Please open Ian’s eyes to see exactly what his path and next steps are. Please shower us with Your favor and grace today. Give me the grace to be loving and compassionate with Gramma–downright in love with her and aware of her adorable-ness–and gentle and nurturing with my amazing children. And strong and loving with Ian. And helpful and inspiring to the other moms at park day. May we find fantastic friends and build our tribe. And may all our ventures–including this video career–magnify and glorify YOU.
In Jesus’ name and by the power of His blood, Amen! 🙂