Category Archives: Discipline Junkie

Disciplines vs. Distraction——-Which One Will I Feed More Today?

Abba, You are the Wise One. You are Wisdom. You have the complete perspective on everything. You know and understand how everything fits together and why. You know where this is all headed, and You know our secret motives, the things we don’t admit even to ourselves. You’re also the Sovereign One. Nothing escapes Your notice or Your grasp. You are ultimately in control of everything. Your impeccable wisdom combined with Your all-encompassing sovereignty leave us in a place where no worry is necessary. You know exactly what needs to happen when, and You are able to make it happen. Nothing can stop Your plans, not even our own human weaknesses or disobedience.

I confess that my human weaknesses are many. I fear that Distraction is among the worst of them, while Undisciplined-ness vies closely for that top spot. My heart is ever willing, but my flesh is so ridiculously weak. And while my heart craves the spiritual disciplines that will inevitably bring the flesh into line, my flesh is still the strong one. I’m still losing that battle every day. And I’m still not taking the battle seriously. I confess that I dawdle about Kingdom priorities but slavishly serve the busy-ness and bustle of the world’s priorities. I get sucked right into that vortex of meaninglessness and let the Enemy win time and again.

THANK YOU for this early morning time when You bring this to my awareness. Thank You for Your patience. Thank You for the spiritual disciplines, like special tools the mentor gives the hero in an adventure. Thank You that You are sending into my life even now a spiritual director or mentor who can help keep me accountable, who can keep steering me back toward the light when I drift. Thank You for the Holy Spirit, already in my life doing just that (if only I were aware of it & tuned to hear His voice!!). Thank You that You understand our human weaknesses. Thank You for reminding me of Your infinite wisdom last night at Bible study. Thank You for the creative ideas You’ve given me, and thank You that You will help me bring them to fruition. Thank You for my amazing family and this day to celebrate together–our last day before Ben’s school starts. Thank You for his new school and all the good that it brings with it. Thank You for our new schedule and structure!

Please bless this day with Your favor. May we have deep Real Moments as a family and slow down to really enjoy each other’s presence. Please help me manage my emotions so I can be even and strong tomorrow as I meet Ben’s teacher and drop him off for his first day at school tomorrow. Help me to shift back to excitement every time the tears start to come tomorrow (but give me time in private to cry my eyes out, because I know that’s good for me too!). Please help me sort out financial income avenues so that I can attend not only Art of Money but also B-school, and create something like Stratejoy’s Elevate Mastermind group. I would love to lead a group of ladies through a fun year like that! Also give me wisdom as to my screenplays and career strategies. Thank You!

In Jesus’ mighty name, amen!

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Seeking First the Unconditionality of God

Abba, You are Eternal and Majestic. Everywhere at once. All-knowing, all-seeing, all-powerful. You invented all of this, from our brains to the rain, from emotions to the oceans. You created the very idea of weather and beauty and nature and Life. You gave us breath, created our spirits, and invented language. You are so beyond anything I could ever comprehend. You are endlessly loving and kind, and You go above and beyond showering us with gifts every day. You don’t take it personally when we don’t notice. You just keep loving and giving because that’s Who You are. You forgive us completely and wipe the slate clean over and over and over. YOU adore US!

I confess that I have NOT been seeking first the Kingdom. I’d honestly forgotten about that verse all together. It wasn’t until I was meditating on the free gifts You sent us yesterday, wondering so ridiculously what I’d done “right” in order to deserve them, when I realized they were just a grace, just a gift. I confess that subconsciously, where I can’t completely access and change those thoughts, I must still think that I have to EARN Your favor. I’m still playing the good little girl and trying to please You. I still don’t understand Your radical unconditional love. And I confess that I’m NOT practicing the spiritual disciplines that would enable those subconscious changes to happen, not placing myself at Your feet and in Your presence often enough for You to get any real work done on growing and healing my spirit.

THANK YOU for Your unconditionality, even if I don’t understand it and can’t receive it fully. Thank You for the free stroller and high chair we so badly needed! Thank You for giving me the energy and motivation to clean the house yesterday, so I can feel sane again inside these walls. Thank You for the kids’ great attitude about helping out, even if they DID need to nap in the middle. 😉 Thank You so much for the Manna Room and our adorable friends there. Thank You for this season of poverty and the many gifts it has brought. Thank You for all the free food in our fridge to get us through the weekend. Thank You for parents’ night tonight.

Please bless the work of our minds today as we plan out this evening–give us extra favor and grace to pull it off in a way that blesses everyone involved and makes huge advances in relationship and connection among the Mosaic parents. May we all leave this evening feeling like it was one of the best nights of our lives, and may lasting friendships be built and strengthened. Please also help me to build a Discipline Junkie community that can grow in the spiritual disciplines together and sharpen each other, encourage one another toward more focus on You and more practicing the things that will actually make the biggest difference in our lives. Remind me to seek You and Your Kingdom and righteousness first, and teach me again what that even looks like in my specific circumstances. Please make me like You–loving EVERYONE UNCONDITIONALLY. Thank You for Your patience!

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen!

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