Tag Archives: Christmas

Let’s End this Season of Defeat

Abba, You are almighty, unchanging, holy, and perfect. You love me completely–not just the “good” parts, but all of me–my doubts, insecurities, addictions, depression, distraction, all of it. You are brilliance and strength, eternal youth and ancient wisdom. You are capable of absolutely anything at any time. Nothing is too big or too complicated for You. And You are all good, all pure, all love.

I confess that I feel completely useless, worn out, depressed, and hopelessly distracted. Last night I obviously trusted more in my addictions’ power to comfort and numb me than in Your power to redeem the time and make my evening something magical. I confess that I’m caught in a web and don’t know how to get out. A lot of the time I don’t even want to get out.

Thank You that You keep pulling me back to you, even in the midst of my mess. Thank You that You never give up hope. Thank You that I am on an endless journey through eternity and there is plenty of time.

Please cure me of my hurry-sickness. Please direct me toward the highest and best use of my time, and don’t let me get distracted by that which is unessential to Your purpose. Please bring healing and tenderness and connection to my marriage. Cleanse us from our worldliness and complacency, and set us on fire for You. Redeem this season and make it our best Christmas yet. Thank You for our freedom and power. Please help us to use it wisely. Draw us close to You every minute of the day. Don’t let me wander like a sheep. I’m desperate for You, Abba, yet still running to my unfaithful lovers. Rescue me from myself!!! I beg You. Don’t let me waste even one more day.

Thank You for Your grace, and that defeat is never permanent.

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

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Work, Worship, Wisdom, Parties, and Presence

Abba, You are holy, whole, complete, not lacking anything. You are eternal, infinite, unlimited, without end, forever. You are loving, kind, generous, tenderhearted, forgiving, understanding, compassionate, faithful, true, worthy, dependable. You are the breath we breathe, the beating of our hearts, our souls’ one true desire, the Spirit that animates everything. You are divine, other, almighty, omnipotent, omniscient, beyond all human comprehension. You are beauty, love, comedy, adventure, inspiration, friendship, fun, brilliance, wisdom, courage, hope, faith. You are everything and the only thing worth anything. You are all that matters.

I confess that I wandered into the grasp of the 10,000 things again. Your little sheep has once again gone astray. I confess that i was attempting to run my own life without turning to You every hour for fresh inspiration, fresh filling with Your Holy Spirit, fresh connection and direction. Fresh insight and wisdom.

Thank You for pulling me back to You now. Thank You for your compassion and tenderness and love. Thank You for my incredible family and for the Christmas season. Thank You for saving me out of the grips of religiosity. Thank You for our church and for its freedom. Thank You that the kids get to perform in the Christmas play. Thank You for laughter and hugs and snuggling and “Unconditional Parenting.” Thank You that I get to babysit today, to serve my friends and be trusted with their child. Thank You that You are handling our finances and I don’t need to worry or plot or strive. Thank You for the birthing documentary and that it’s happening so organically and naturally. Thank You for the free coaching session with Jill last week and for the likelihood of opening up a channel of income by offering coaching services. Thank You that Ian is soaking in Your Word and pursuing Your Truth and sharing Your gospel. Thank You for the book Prayer Power and Purpose.

Please guide my daily work in Your perfect way and keep me from taking off on any distracted tangents. Please direct me to worship music that will allow my soul to find its home in You by being redirected to You with each thought, every time the song repeats in my mind. Please give us wisdom as to which channels of income to open up in order to provide for the needs of our family without getting too caught up in the world’s schtuff. Please shape the Tribe of Girlfriends Inner Circle pre-2015 party in the way that best pleases You. Please do the same with our first Prayer and Potluck party, so that we can share our home and family and hearts with our friends. Please help us to get the house & garage “dialed in” so that it’s a great space for that party to happen. Please keep calling me today, loud and clear, to be Your ambassador, Your avatar, Your presence here in my life circumstances.

I love you. I want to Know You. Experience You. Serve You. Glorify You. Magnify You. Love You more. Please You.

In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

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Why do I pray? Because it WORKS!!!

Abba (Who I understand You to be in my very limited understanding at this time),

Gratitude, like faith, is a muscle... 366/54 F...

Gratitude, like faith, is a muscle… (Photo credit: ConnectIrmeli)

You are the Creator of absolutely everything–all beauty, comedy, nature, magic, love, romance, adventure… You are the animating force behind all life. You are the Lover of my soul, the One Who is always calling to me, always wooing me, always romancing me and waiting for me to notice, to receive, to appreciate the amazing gifts you prepare for me in each and every moment.

I confess that I have missed 99.9% of what You’ve done for me, and that I forget you exist most of the time. I take You for granted. I get caught up in the most ridiculous meaninglessness. I worry about the details instead of trusting you and giving you my sincere requests.

THANK YOU that You forgive me before I even ask You to, that You hold nothing against me, that You shine Your sun on me whether I notice or not, that You are constant and steady and true and faithful and completely independent of anything I do or don’t do. Thank You for this miraculous beautiful life growing inside my belly. Thank You for the extraordinary children You’ve already blessed us with, for how healthy and sweet and honest and truly good they are. Thank You for wisdom and guidance, for this job opportunity with Emancipated Foster Youth at Olive Crest, for the very real possibility that we will be in an apartment home of our own very soon. Thank You for the rain and Christmas season. Thank You for the absolute abundance of Christmas parties and events we’ve been a part of this year, for the community of loved ones surrounding us, and for the hope of our very own Christmas miracle. Thank You for the gift of writing, for Mommy’s Secret Smile, the Bathwater Revival, the SAHMbie movement, and the 12 steps to true change. Thank You for love. Thank You for Ian and that I still like him after almost 12 years and all that we’ve been through. Thank You for movies and the film industry and that we live in California.

My specific requests today include clear guidance about the move to Orange County, and a big THANK YOU for whatever home you have prepared for us for this next year. I also ask You for wisdom and assistance with parenting, so that Ben can be guided into being all he can be, and Elsie can be encouraged to have a more proactive, positive attitude and consistently sweet spirit. May they find inspiration and purpose in their everyday routines and responsibilities. May we bring You glory and love all Your children well. May we fall asleep this evening with a clear conscience and grateful hearts exhausted by the giving and fully living.

Amen! And so it is. 😉

p.s. Thank You for the Prayer Jar being back in my life!

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