Good Morning, Abba. You are here with me. You are also on the throne in Heaven, ruling over all Life everywhere. You are also active and dynamic and so much more than just a being on a throne or just a force of nature holding all life together. You are as gentle and tender as a mother caressing her newborn, and as fierce and wild as a roaring tornado. You are compassionate and kind without being domesticated. Unpredictable but not reckless. Thoughtful yet free from analysis paralysis. Infinitely wise and able to see from every possible angle, including from within. You get it. All of it.
I confess that I am so ridiculously shy and nervous and self-conscious in groups, which means I’m obviously thinking about myself too much and Your purposes too little. I have the intention of being present with Your children and connecting with others, and afterwards it seems like it would have been so easy. But in the moment, at the Halloween party, I just froze up and stuck to very safe conversations and snacks. I so long to be other than I am. I want to ask great questions and really offer people my presence–Your presence in me–but I feel so inadequate and incapable of making that happen. That must be the enemy’s voice working to steal, kill, and destroy community. Knowing that, and knowing how lonely most people are even in the midst of community, my job is to arm myself ahead of time, to do spiritual warfare and take control BEFORE social gatherings. I confess I’ve not been doing that. I’ve been completely irresponsible spiritually.
THANK YOU for opening my eyes to see that! Thank You for the power of prayer, and that we are just entering the holiday season, so there will be lots more opportunities to try again. Thank You so so much that we are in a community now and that we’ve found a church to call home and that we get invited to parties. Thank You for the power of community. Thank You for Your love in human hearts. Thank You for the power of faith. Thank You that You save us from the twin errors of religiosity and spiritual neglect. Thank You for the shift You’re working in me to be able to accept money in return for work and coaching services. Thank You for the gentle path of slow incremental growth. Thank You for this year of living tortoisely.
Please bless the work of my hands today. Draw to me just the right people for the Discipline Junkies community. Give me supernatural peace and calm in the midst of my busy morning. May I radiate Your love and generosity to everyone I see this morning. And please give me wisdom in time management and priorities. Please continue to guide Ian in the direction of his work, and give him the wisdom and courage to charge for his services as well. Please help Elsie to cycle through this runny nose period quickly, and please grant us wisdom in this possibility of this new school for Ben.
Thank You so much! In Jesus’ name i pray, amen!